Sunday, February 26, 2017
Saturday, February 25, 2017
Pre-Title Match Interviews
We’re less than 24 hours away from the first AWL Grand Championship Match of
the regular season. As per custom, I
happily turn this forum over to the two men who will compete in the main event
of AWL 203 for the Animated Wrestling League Grand Championship:
Euption Solar (Translated from Spanish):
When I was invited to take part in the New Year’s Tournament, I never
thought I’d be writing something like this less than 2 months later. I must admit, I’m a little overwhelmed. I’ve only been wrestling for about a year and
it doesn’t feel like I’ve “earned” this opportunity. Being AWL World’s Tag Team Champion is
already an incredible honor and responsibility, but now I have the chance to be
the first person in history to hold both tag team and singles titles at the
same time.
But then I pause and realize that I DO deserve this! For all the talk in wrestling about “paying
dues,” the only thing that matters is what happens between the ropes. I pinned the AWL Grand Champion clean in the
middle of the ring. That earned me a title
match. And while I regret what happened
to Hassan and I hope he gets better soon and returns to action as soon as
possible, I would have gotten this match sooner or later. So Sammy Nix, the next generation is coming
for you. This weekend, I’m taking that
Grand Championship back to Mexico!
Sammy Nix:
Let’s make one thing clear. Kid, I
like ya. As my old man would say, ya got
moxie. And yeah, ya pinned the AWL Grand
Champion…the same one I
pinned to win this belt. You’ve NEVER
beaten me and this Sunday ain’t gonna break that pattern.
We’re gonna get in the ring, I’m gonna deliver a Brooklyn style beat down,
and you’re going to lose. Then, someday
soon, Lee and I are gonna get our three points and we’re coming for those tag
team titles.
Solar, yer gonna be Grand Champion someday, I’m sure of it…just not today.
Friday, February 24, 2017
Full Card for AWL 203
OK wrestling fans, without further ado, here’s the full card for this
weekend’s AWL 203 event:
MAIN EVENT
Sammy Nix (C) vs. Erupcion Solar (#2)
AWL Grand Championship Match—1st Title Defense
Points in Play:
Team Victory (1) vs. Los Neko Grande (0)
The Augments (1) vs. Team GWM (0)
NOTE: We still don’t know which wrestlers from Global Wrestling Monopoly
will comprise Team GWM. Normally I’d
complain about how their opponents won’t have time to adequately prepare, but
considering that said opponents are the Augments…I don’t care and neither
should you.
Space Monkey vs. The DOOMBUNNY
An abbreviated card this week thanks to the extended time limit for the Grand Championship Match, but plenty of animated wrestling action from the AWL. I’ll be back tomorrow with exclusive comments from both the champion and challenger in the AWL Grand Championship main event.
Thursday, February 23, 2017
Tag Team Double Team
Two tag team matches have been announced for this weekend’s AWL 203
event. The eternal quest for 3 points
continues!
Team Victory (1) vs. Los Neko Grande (0)
The Augments (1) vs. Team GWM (0)
OK, a couple of notes here. Firstly,
we have received no information from Miss X or anyone at Global Wrestling
Monopoly regarding who will comprise the GWM team. We’ll all just have to tune in and find out.
Second, the last time we saw Los Neko Grande, they were on the opposite side of a Video Cybernetico Match at National Pro Wrestling Day (which Tiger Mask II won to become the AWL Intercontinental Champion). So it will be interesting to see if they’ve gotten back on the same page.
Wednesday, February 22, 2017
Lions and Monkeys and Bunnies OH MY!
In a
move that I swear was not an excuse to use that subject header, the AWL
Commissioner has announced that the Chikara Young Lion’s Cup Champion Space
Monkey, is coming to the AWL! The
suborbital simian will make his AWL debut this weekend at AWL 203 and will face
(as you probably guessed from the aforementioned subject line) The DOOMBUNNY!
Tuesday, February 21, 2017
American Beetle Suspended!
Due to his conduct at and after AWL 202, American Beetle has been suspended
for 30 days and has been fined the equivalent of 1 month’s pay.
Additionally, Hassan suffered an upper body injury from the attack by
American Beetle and has not been medically cleared to wrestle next week. Therefore his AWL Grand Championship Match is
being postponed pending further medical evaluation.
However, the AWL has promised the fans a Grand Championship Match and that
is exactly what they are going to get.
Despite the result of last weekend’s main event, the #2 contender will
face the Grand Champion next week:
AWL 203:
MAIN EVENT
Sammy Nix (C) vs. Erupcion Solar (#2)
AWL Grand Championship Match—1st Title Defense
Sunday, February 19, 2017
Thursday, February 16, 2017
Full Card for AWL 202
No public address from the AWL Commissioner this week, he’s a busy man and apparently
they’re doing some renovations to his office or something. But we do have the full six match card for
AWL 202:
AWL 202:
MAIN EVENT
Erupcion Solar (#1) vs. Hassan (#2)—Rank on the Line
Winner challenges Sammy Nix for the AWL Grand Championship Next week!
Many wrestling fans and analysts are saying that Erupcion Solar should
not even be in the AWL Best 4, let alone the #1 Contender. Well, he’ll have to prove the doubters wrong
and earn his spot this weekend as he goes one on one with the runner up from
the 2017 New Year’s Tournament and Triple Crown Champion Hassan.
The Augments (0) vs. Shin Jidai (0)—Points in Play
It’s the classic wrestling story of super heroes versus cyborg crimes
against nature. Well, it’s classic in
the AWL at any rate. Second generation
grapplers Wyvern and Matt Classic Jr. face the metal monster Project Tetsu and
the human wrestling Xerox machine Wrestler X.
Both teams enter the weekend with zero points so, one way or another, we
will be one step closer to finding challengers for the AWL World’s Tag Team
Championship.
Yellow Devil vs. “THUGLIFE” Tanaka Kenichi—Hardcore Match
The winner of the Clash of Styles Tournament and (ugh) Ultimate Master of
the Ultimate Style of Professional Wrestling brings his Golden Opportunity to
Season 11 as he faces Yellow Devil in a match where anything goes. Should be a cakewalk for the “Representative
of Hardcore”…right?
For safety reasons, and at the insistence of the Tokyo Athletic Commission,
Miss X will not be allowed at ringside for this match.
Team Victory (0) vs. The Destroyers of DOOM! (1)—Points in Play
As announced yesterday, the newly formed Team Victory will have their first
match together this weekend. What’s new
is the knowledge that they have drawn a horrible team to face in their first
bout. These are no nameless enhancement talent,
these are former AWL World Tag Team Champions and the former Golden Duo. While I feel Team Victory has enormous
potential, this is going to be a challenge.
Tiny (#4) vs. Big Jerry
Some matches are just meant to happen and this is one of them. The two biggest superheavyweights on the AWL
Roster face off one on one. The most
important thing to keep in mind about this match is that great big number 4
next to Tiny’s name. If Tiny loses to an
unranked wrestler like Big Jerry, there’s a very good chance the American will
be out of the Best 4 and the Brit will take his place. High stakes at AWL 202.
Ma-Ji-Ku vs. Estrella Dorada
With so many juniors, thirds, and fourths in Lucha Libre, the generation
gap is something that is never far from the minds of Mexican wrestlers. And the Mexican contingent of the AWL Roster
is no different. We’re going to kick off
AWL 202 with a generation gap match and a Lucha Libre showcase as the longest
serving luchador in AWL history, Ma-Ji-Ku faces the young man from The Heavens,
Estrella Dorada.
It’s going to be an action packed weekend at AWL 202!
New Tag Team Formed!
The AWL Tag Team Division is a shambles at the moment. With the All Americans seemingly irrevocably split,
RUZAI down to one jerk, and one half of Los Neko Grande seemingly gone over to
the dark side, we need some new blood in the tag team division.
That’s why I was surprised and pleased when the AWL Commissioner announced
to the office this morning that we have a new officially registered tag team!
Team Name: Team
Victory
Members: Chiba
Akagi. Hifumi Ryuji.
Current Points: 0.
Yes, you read that correctly, the most recent AWL Grand Champion has
decided to set his sights on tag team gold and Triple Crown Champion
Status! And who could be a better
partner for the Scion of Submission than the Prince of the Pinfall. With two such specialist on one team, they
might have picked the right name.
Team Victory will have their first match together this weekend. Their opponents have yet to be announced.
Also in tag team action, spinning out of last weekend’s time limit draw,
Wrestler X and Matt Classic Jr. get a second crack at each other with their
partners by their sides.
Shin Jidai (MC2 & Wyvern) (0) vs. The Augments (Tetsu & Wrestler X)
(0)
Points in Play
Wednesday, February 15, 2017
Fallout from AWL 201
Last weekend we all saw what the referee didn’t. Specifically that the so called star of
Global Wrestling Monopoly was not only taken to the limit by Mr. Smiles of all
people, but that Yellow Devil had to cheat to win. Yellow Devil did pin Mr. Smiles, but with his
feet on the ropes in an illegal hold.
Unfortunately, the referee’s decision is final and Yellow Devil will go
down as the winner of the bout, but he has proven exactly nothing.
That’s why the AWL Commissioner has booked Yellow Devil in another match
for this week’s AWL 202:
Yellow Devil (GWM) vs. “THUGLIFE” Tanaka Kenichi (AWL)
HARDCORE RULES
Speaking personally (and this is just my personal opinion), I think the AWL
Commissioner is looking to kill two birds with one stone. Yellow Devil gets placed in a match where he’s
likely to suffer a severe beating even if he wins and Tanaka Kenichi has to
fight a wrestler known for injuring or crippling his opponents. Everybody wins!
Speaking of which, Mr. Smiles suffered a cracked rib at the hands of Yellow
Devil and will be out of action for at least a few weeks. All of us here at the AWL wish him a speedy
recovery.
Finally for today, the main event of AWL 202 has been signed:
Erupcion Solar (#1) vs. Hassan (#2)—Rank on the Line
That’s right! The number one and two contenders face off to determine who gets a shot at the AWL Grand Championship next week at AWL 203!
Sunday, February 12, 2017
Saturday, February 11, 2017
Full Card for AWL 201
OK guys, well you heard it straight from the boss’ mouth yesterday. GWM is officially on their way to the
AWL! Oh, and we have the singles and tag
team divisions to sort out as well. It’s
going to be a LONG weekend.
AWL 201
MAIN EVENT:
Tiger Mask II (C) vs. Big Foot (GWM)
AWL Intercontinental Championship Match—1st Title Defense
The boss talked all about this yesterday, so I’ll keep this short. Tiger Mask faces the biggest challenge of his
career, literally. I believe Big Foot is
the largest wrestler in terms of both height and weight that has ever set foot
in the AWL. He has a reputation for
finishing off his opponents in less than 5 minutes. Will Tiger Mask II be able to escape Big
Foot’s deadly bear hug? We’ll find out
together at AWL 201.
Semi Final:
Jack Butcher vs. Tiny
Fight for 3 & 4
In this bronze medal match from the 2017 New Year’s Tournament, two giants
will clash to determine who will take the higher place in the AWL Best 4. The winner of the match shall take the #3
position, the loser #4. Who will move
one step closer to a shot at the AWL Grand Championship?
All Americans (2) vs. The New Classics (0)
Points in Play
Every once in a while I think the AWL Commissioner has truly lost his
mind. This is one of those
situations. Those of you who saw the
AWL’s contribution to National Pro Wrestling Day will have seen American Beetle
attack Hassan after the Arab American Dream’s match against Lee Masters. Mr. Masters and the AWL Grand Champion Sammy
Nix have disavowed any foreknowledge of American Beetles actions and I, for
one, believe them. However, I have no
idea how the AWL Commissioner thinks Beetle and Hassan are going to be able to
team together as The All Americans with this attack hanging over their
heads. If, by some miracle, American
Beetle and Hassan win this match, they will have the 3 Points needed to challenge
Liga Cosmica for the AWL World’s Tag Team Titles.
Yellow Devil (GWM) vs. Mr. Smiles (AWL)
Inter-promotional Match
Another match explained by the boss yesterday. Again, I don’t personally agree with his
decision to allow this match. Yellow
Devil is well known for his unprofessional conduct. He has been known to cripple wrestlers for
life or leave them otherwise permanently scarred. To throw poor Mr. Smiles to the wolves like
this…I just can’t condone it.
Wrestler X vs. Matt Classic Jr.
The new season begins as the old season ended, with Shin Jidai trying to
stop Dr. Jigoku and his augments from taking over the AWL (and someday, the
WORLD). At AWL 200 in the Tokyo Dome, it
was revealed that Wrestler X has been an Augment ever since he first set foot
in the AWL. That’s how he’s able to copy
the move set of his opponents so perfectly, cybernetic cheating. Wrestler X will no doubt copy Matt Classic
Jr.’s impressive move set, so we’re guaranteed a technical marvel of a
wrestling match at least.
Destroyers of DOOM (0) vs. The Empire (1)
Points in Play
After what I can only assume was a thrilling victory over the Chikara
Campeones de Parejas (and the WWE UK Champion) Mustache Mountain, The Empire
look to continue their winning ways against a set of former AWL World Tag Team
Champions, HAKAISHA! and the Doombunny, the Destroyers of DOOM! If you love “odd couple” or big man/little
man tag teams, then this will be the match for you.
It all happens this
weekend at AWL 201!
Friday, February 10, 2017
Commissioner's Weekly Address
Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I am the AWL Commissioner.
First of all, I would like to congratulate Sammy Nix and Tiger Mask II for
becoming the new Animated Wrestling League Grand and Intercontinental Champions
respectively. I speak for the entire
league when I say that I look forward to many outstanding championship matches
from both of them.
However, I must now address the proverbial elephant in the room. The Global Wrestling Monopoly has made public
false statements about the Animated Wrestling League and an invitation that was
never extended to them. However, I enjoy
a challenge and I have accepted their offer on a per-appearance basis. That means that I have unilateral discretion
to ban any and all GWM competitors form the AWL at will. This will NOT turn into another Bullet Club
debacle.
That said, I have COMMISSIONED the following matches for AWL 201:
AWL 201 Main Event
Tiger Mask II (C) vs. Big Foot (GWM)
AWL Intercontinental Championship Match—1st Title Defense
Before COMMISSIONING this match, I spoke to Tiger Mask II and did something
I usually do not do. I gave him veto
power over the match. He has chosen to
fight Big Foot and that is the only reason this match is happening. As for the second GWM member who has
challenged my AWL Roster, he needs to know that one does not become a main
eventer in the Animated Wrestling League just by saying “I am a main
eventer.” Therefore…
Yellow Devil (GWM) vs. Mr. Smiles
This shall most assuredly be a mid-card match. Let us see if one of the best of GWM can defeat
one of our lowest ranked competitors.
Personally, I doubt it.
Finally, I have two items to note regarding the AWL Roster. First of all, the AWL has come to terms on
the release of the wrestler known as Bruce Hoyt from his AWL contract. We wish him well in all his future endeavors.
Secondly, AWL junior official Daiki Babaganoush has left the AWL to
complete his final training to become a full time, unmasked, referee. This is a procedure that all members of the
world famous Babaganoush Wrestling Family undergo as part of their
training. We wish him great success in
this and all his future endeavors.
The full card for AWL 201 will be announced tomorrow.
Wednesday, February 8, 2017
Insert fake news joke here
The following press release came across my desk early this morning:
Global Wrestling Monopoly is proud to announce that our wrestlers have been
invited to compete in the Animated Wrestling League’s Intercontinental
Division! On behalf of our chairman, Mr.
X, GWM general manager Miss X happily accepts this offer and Miss X herself
will personally escort our first challenger for the AWL Intercontinental
Championship for his match at AWL 201.
The wrestler in question is the Giant of GWM, the largest masked wrestler
in the world, Big Foot! 7’3” and tipping
the scales at 555lb, this mountain of a man will crush the AWL Intercontinental
Champion with his patented bear hug.
Also, GWM main eventer Yellow Devil will grace the AWL with his presence
when he issues an Open Challenge to any AWL wrestler foolish enough to challenge
him.
--Miss X
Tuesday, February 7, 2017
News coming out of National Pro Wrestling Day (No time skip needed)
We have a new Grand Champion!
Sammy
Nix is officially the 7th AWL Grand Champion! (Since the unification
of the heavyweight and light heavyweight titles). He joins Tanaka Kenichi, Wyvern, Hassan,
Okada Kazuchika, Project Tetsu, and Chiba Akagi in this exclusive
brotherhood. He is also the second
wrestler to win the New Year’s Tournament and the Grand Championship on back to
back shows (Wyvern did the same thing last year when he defeated Tanaka Kenichi
for the title). Sammy Nix is also the
second foreigner and second American to win the title.
But he has a difficult road ahead of him.
The new #1 Contender is Erupcion Solar, the young luchador who defeated
former champion Chiba Akagi in the New Year’s Tournament. If Sammy survives that challenge he can look
forward to a rematch from the New Year’s Tournament Final against Hassan. Beyond
that? There are two giants waiting in
the wings to squash the little suplex master into a human pancake. All in a day’s work for the AWL Grand
Champion.
We also have a NEW AWL Intercontinental Champion in Tiger Mask II. He’s looking for competition so he can rack up those all-important 5 wins and cash in for a free shot at the Grand Championship. Twice the AWL IC Title has been cashed in and twice a new Grand Champion has been crowned. Will Tiger Mask be the third? We’ll find out together because Tiger Mask’s first title defense as already been scheduled for THIS WEEKEND at AWL 201!! The identity of the challenger has yet to be announced, but we hope to have that news for you as soon as possible.
Sunday, February 5, 2017
Friday, February 3, 2017
Rules and Promos
With National Pro Wrestling Day just 24 hours away, I’m typing this on the
plane from Narita to Philadelphia International Airport (With an annoyingly
long layover in Atlanta). Not only do I
have the traditional comments from both the champion and challenger in the main
event Grand Championship Match, I have a quick refresher course on the rules of
an AWL Video Cybernetico Match.
VIDEO CYBERNETICO:
1. 6 wrestlers compete in an elimination trios match.
2. Once one team is completely eliminated, the remaining wrestlers on the
winning team (if there’s more than one) must wrestle each other.
3. The last man standing is declared the winner and for the first time at
National Pro Wrestling Day, that winner will become the NEW AWL
Intercontinental Champion!
Up next, comments from the challenger for the AWL Grand Championship this
Sunday and the winner of the 2017 New Year’s Tournament: Sammy Nix:
Yo what up Philadelphia! Straight
outta Brooklyn your 2017 NYT Champion here!
I told everyone that my new Chimera-Plex was going to be the key to
winning the tournament and I proved myself to be a man of my word. But the NYT was only the first step. This Saturday I step into a Chikara ring for
the biggest match of my career. For
years Lee and I have been known as the best tag team in AWL history bar
absolutely NONE! But neither of us have
ever had that big singles run. We love
tag team wrestling, but everyone on the AWL Roster wants to be Grand Champion
whether they’ll admit it or not.
This Saturday in Philadelphia, I get that chance. Chiba Akagi is one hell of a wrestler,
especially for his age. But as long as I
can wrestle my kind of match and keep out of his grip, the Chimera-Plex is
going to make me the NEW AWL Grand Champion!
And now, some words from the Grand Champion (Translated from Japanese):
At AWL 200 in front of a sold out Tokyo Dome, I defeated a monster. I out lasted a machine custom designed to
replace us. I defeated that monster
machine so badly that Dr. Jigoku had to rebuild it from the ground up (and it
still lost in the New Year’s Tournament).
Sammy Nix, you’re an AWL legend, no doubt about it. But you’re only a man. I’ve beaten monsters, surely I can beat you. This Saturday in your home country, you are
going to be tied up in a human knot and you…will…tap…out!
It all happens Saturday in Philadelphia at National Pro Wrestling Day!
This Year's Charity
As always the annual National Pro Wrestling Day celebration is a charity
show and all proceeds are donated to a good cause. This year the positive power of professional
wrestling turns inward as we look to help some of our own. This year’s chosen charity is The Super Kick
Foundation.
The Super Kick Foundation is a new charity, founded only last year, and seeks
to use the goodness and generosity of wrestling fans to help the poor and
disadvantaged (especially veterans). As
you might have guessed from the name, independent wrestling star and current
holders of about 5 tag team championships The Young Bucks are heavily involved in
supporting this charity as is WWE Hall of Famer Mick Foley.
In addition to your everyday fundraisers and issue specific drives
(Including a recently competed Just Cause drive to help the victims and
survivors of the Pulse night club shooting), they also seek to raise money to
provide tickets to independent wrestling shows to those who couldn’t otherwise
afford them. Because everyone deserves a
day out at the matches every once and a while.
With your support, The Super Kick Foundation hopes to one day grow to a point where it can offer medical and other forms of assistance to the professional wrestling community. As always, the Animated Wrestling League is happy to help spread the word about this noble endeavor.
Wednesday, February 1, 2017
Full Card for AWL National Pro Wrestling Day
Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I
am the AWL Commissioner.
It is my good pleasure to inform you that we have the rare privilege of
partnering with our good friends at Chikara Pro to present National Pro
Wrestling Day. While my esteemed colleague
Director of Fun Mike Quackenbush is hard at work assembling his Young Lion’s
Cup Tournament, I have COMMISSIONED the following matches to take place this
coming Saturday in the United States:
MAIN EVENT:
Chiba Akagi (C) vs. Sammy Nix (#1)
AWL Grand Championship Match--1st Title
Defense
Ma-Ji-Ku, Tiger Mask II, & The DOOMBUNNY vs. Wrestler X, Prince Puma, & Cage
Video Cybernetico Match
for the Vacant AWL Intercontinental Championship
The Empire vs. Mustache Mountain
(Non-Title Match)
Hassan vs. Lee Masters
THIS! I have COMMISSIONED!!!!!!!!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
--XOXO AWL Commissioner.
New Year:s Tournament fallout begins:
Greetings wrestling fans,
The AWL Commissioner has officially announced the newest
incarnation of the AWL Best 4! They are:
1. Sammy Nix (NYT Winner)
2. Erupcion Solar (Pinned the Grand Champion in a Non-Title Match)
3. Hassan (NYT Runner-up)
4. TBD (Tiny and Jack Butcher are currently tied for this position.)
Hassan will challenge Chiba Akagi for the AWL Grand Championship at
National Pro Wrestling Day this weekend in Philadelphia Pennsylvania. Stay
tuned to this blog tomorrow as we bring you the full card for the AWL’s contribution
to National Pro Wrestling Day.
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