Tag Team Promos

This weekend, 4 tag teams will vie for the chance to make significant advancement in the AWL Tag Team Division. Two of those teams even have the chance to gain the necessary 3 points to challenge Bullet Club for the gold. We begin our cavalcade of comments with those two tandems. First, the newest officially registered team on the roster, The Strike Warriors.

Ma-Ji-Ku (Translated from Spanish): It's been a difficult few months. Losing El Santo Azul was a hard blow. But bookings started flowing in for him mere hours after he lost Batsumania so I know he'll land on his feet and that he has a great career ahead of him in the world of Lucha Libre.

People have been asking me why I agreed to form a new tag team with Strike Taka. I see in Taka a man who has made mistakes and is now trying to fix them. As HAKAISHA! always says, trying to do things the "right way." It is my duty to help young luchadores find their way in this crazy wrestling world of ours. I call myself "The Warrior of Light" for a reason. I want to be an example, a guiding light for both the fans and my fellow wrestlers. Strike Taka has a long way to go, but I know he'll get there eventually.

As for El Rudo Rojo and Jon Shina. Are you happy Rojo? Do you think that by out lasting your brother in the AWL you've proven something? Well, you're wrong. Because El Santo Azul was a Tag Team Champion, something you've NEVER done. And if Taka and I have anything to say about it, you never will.

Now their opponents:

El Rudo Rojo (Translated from Spanish): Jon, did you hear that old stick in the mud talking trash about me? Who the hell does he thing he i*

Jon Shina: Yeah whatever man. Animated Wrestling League! Your United States Of Awesome MEGA Champion is talking! Ma-Ji-Ku sucks. Strike Taka is a freak. Bullet Club are a bunch of poopy heads!! In two measly matches we will all be saying "The CHAMPS. Are. HEEEEEERRREEEEEEE!"

There is something very wrong with that man. Now for the two teams that start with zero points this weekend and hope to acquire two. First, speaking for the Augments, Dr. Jigoku:

Dr. Jigoku: My iron monster, Project Tetsu, is on his way to becoming Grand Champion and proving how SUPEEEEERIOR he is. This weekend he will destroy that obsolete slab of meat that dares call himself a destroyer.

My technical database and my engine of destruction are going to be the last opponents those fools Masters and Nix ever face. They brag that they've won the AWL World Tag Team Titles more often than any other team. All that means to me is that they're very good at losing the titles. Last time they fought Bullet Club they FAILED. Why? Because they are INFERIOR! Aging, broken down, worthless machines of flesh. But my Augments will never suffer the ravages of age. Never feel the sting of failure after Failure after FAILURE!! And once we win the AWL World Tag Team Titles, we will NEVER let them be taken from us!

Why is it that everyone in wrestling has at least a couple of screws loose? Anyway, now on to The New Classics:

Sammy Nix: Lishen up yo creep! We's the best tag team the AWL's eva seen. We ARE tha Tag Team Division! So nows we've got dese Bullet Club mooks running aroun thinkin their hot stuff. They think they's gonna take OUR Tag Team Titles away from the AWL? Not gonna happen. We needs 3 points, so dis Sunday we're takin 2 o' dem out of the Augments' hides.

Tomorrow, comments from the participants in the main event.