A New Rule System Because Sore Losers.

                And, because I don’t have enough work to do apparently, ANOTHER match has been added to AWL 226.  This message was delivered to AWL HQ last night:

                I have come to a conclusion.  My tag team, The Empire, has not fared well this season, nor was I able to capture the Intercontinental Championship last week.  The fault, as my countryman said, lays not in our stars but in ourselves.  I should have seen the situation for what it was.  The problem is not my associate or myself, but in the Animated Wrestling League itself!  This strange hybrid of American and Japanese wrestling rules leaves me at an automatic disadvantage.  Therefore, I am going to educate the AWL as to the way professional wrestling is supposed to be.

                This weekend, at AWL 226, I’m bringing back…World of Sport Rules!  5 rounds of 5 minutes with 2 falls, 2 submissions, or a knockout to decide the winner.  Leaving the ring results in disqualification.  Because I know Joey Babaganoush can’t referee such a sophisticated match for very long, I’ll allow the round to end upon a fall.  Joey’s also not that smart or observant, so I’ll even remove the rule that breaking contact on the mat ends the exchange.

                Once the AWL fans understand what REAL wrestling 
looks like, they’ll be begging for me to be inserted into the Best 4.

--Frederick Victor