AWL 312: Road to Golden War 2020

Full Card for AWL 312

AWL 312

MAIN EVENT

Augments Golden Triangle vs. ResuRED, Azteckaizer NEO, & CrossXGeneration

Atomicos Match

K&K (2) vs. The New Classics (2)

Points in Play

#1 Contenders Match

Yin & Yang (2) vs. The Augments (0)

Points in Play

Yamada Jiro vs. Satoshi Tobu

Athena Jane (#1) vs. Akira Merune (#2) vs. Jessica Kidd (#3)

Reshuffle Match

Dr. Jigoku speaks

       Phase 4 is complete, and my Augments have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt what I have always hypothesized, that when compared to factory standard human wrestlers, we are SUPERIOR!

       However, if it’s not repeatable, it’s not science.  Golden War this year becomes an independent laboratory that will repeat my experiment and confirm my findings.  Gregor Mendel once said of inconclusive or unclear data, “When in doubt, throw it out.”  I adhere to the same philosophy.

        As for the females, much the same can be said of my failed experiments in that inferior division.  No more second chances.

Sometimes it really is that easy.

                For the first time in AWL History, one faction controls every men’s title.  Not a golden duo, golden triangle, but an unprecedented Golden Quadrangle.  At Golden War 2020, the best the AWL has to offer will challenge for the singles titles and hopefully the best of the tag team division will step up to the mark.  Sometimes these matches book themselves.

Augment Golden Quadrangle vs. ResuRED, Azteckaizer NEO, & CrossXGeneration

Atomicos Match

Yamada Jiro speaks

The following message was translated from the original Japanese by the AWL Translation Team.

                I will give the AWL Commissioner credit.  He’s the only wrestling promoter in the country to have the balls to continue the sport of professional wrestling while true Japanese are fighting the foreign disease.  He has earned my respect, and that coward Tanahashi Hiroshi has completely lost it.  Btu that’s a matter for another day.

                Speaking of respect, there is a man among us who has no respect for himself, his nation, or his sport.  I’m referring to that fat slob Satoshi Tobu.  This weekend, in the Dojo he should never have been admitted to, let alone allowed out of, I’m going to show him that being a fat bastard with a few power moves is not enough to survive in MY ring.

Contenders Wanted!

                We’re less than two weeks away from Golden War 2020 and we are looking for challengers to the rest of the AWL championships.  To that end:

K&K (2) vs. The New Classics (2)

Points in Play

Winners to challenge at Golden War 2020

                We have two teams with two points in the men’s tag team division that makes this a de facto #1 contender’s match.  On one side, the most decorated tag team in AWL History.  On the other, a cheating knobhead and a REALLY tall guy.  I think it’s obvious which team has a better chance of beating The Augments and bringing the AWL World’s Tag Team Championships back to the Animated Wrestling League.

               Up next, there are two titles in the Joshi Division and we’re looking for challengers for both this weekend.  One we’re sure to get, the other is a bit more up in the air.

Athena Jane (#1) vs. Akira Merune (#2) vs. Jessica Kidd (#3)

Reshuffle Match

Winner to challenge at Golden War 2020

Yin & Yang (2) vs. The Augments (0)

Points in Play

If Yin & Yang win, they will challenge at Golden War 2020

                It’s not exactly news that Dr. Jigoku has been unhappy with the performance of his Augments in the Joshi Division.  If they can’t pick up a point this weekend after being the first team eliminated from the 4-Way Match last weekend, I wouldn’t expect to see them around again.

                That’s all for now.  Stay tuned to this blog for the rest of the weekend for more match announcements and all the news from the Animated Wrestling League.  

AWL 311: Dragoness vs. Wild Thing

Full Card for AWL 311

AWL 311

MAIN EVENT

Dragoness (C) vs. Wild Thing (#1)

AWL Joshi Championship Match

3^rd Title Defense

Yin & Yang (0) vs. The Augments (0) vs. Ladies of Lucha (0) vs. Modern Day Warriors (0)

4-Way Tag Team Elimination Match

Points in Play

Yamada Jiro (C) vs. Kyoujin Kobayashi w/Tanaka Kenichi

                But wait!  There’s MORE!!  These two matches we just added this morning:

The Augments vs. Purosentai Resuranger

Atomicos Match

                With ResuRED confirmed as the next challenger for the AWL Grand Championship, this will be an excellent warm up match for both champion and challenger.

Satoshi Tobu vs. Michael Dunne

                The most recent graduate of the AWL Dojo faces one of his former senpai.  Will anyone notice?

Yamada Jiro Speaks

The following message has been translated from the original Japanese by the AWL Translation Team.

                「It’s bad enough they allow filthy criminal foreigners to stain the ring with their disease and filth, but now they have infected the very moral fiber of professional wrestling.  Kyoujin Kobayashi was nothing but a dojo washout when I found him and brought him in to Nippon Yokatta.  But too much time around the gaijin has poisoned his mind and made him turn traitor.  Now he’s joined that sell out punk Tanaka-kun.  I demand a match with the traitor at the next tournament!」

                Ryusensei here again.  Well, as little sense as that made, Yamato Jiro does have a point that Tanaka Kenichi poached the contract of Kyoujin Kobayashi out from under his nose.  So, the AWL Commissioner has agreed to this match:

Yamada Jiro vs. Kyoujin Kobayashi w/Tanaka Kenichi

                Tune in this weekend for all the irrational action in the Animated Wrestling League.

Joshi Championship Match Set for This Weekend

                AWL Joshi Champion Dragoness has been publicly frustrated over the infrequency of her title matches.  She wants t0 be a fighting champion and has requested a title defense both this weekend and, if she is still champion, at the Golden War.  Fortunately, this is why we have the AWL Best 4 system:

AWL 311

MAIN EVENT

Dragoness (C) vs. Wild Thing (#1)

                Elsewhere in the Joshi Division, it’s a long shot but there’s a chance we can find challengers for UK Gen2’s AWL Joshi Tag Team Championships.  But we’re going to need to get some points on the board and FAST.  That’s where this match comes in:

Yin & Yang (0) vs. The Augments (0) vs. Ladies of Lucha (0) vs. Modern Day Warriors. (0)

4-Way Elimination Match

Points in Play

                Like I said, long shot.  But if any of these 4 teams can run the table and eliminate all other teams, they can walk away with the 3 points needed to challenge for the gold.  Will it happen?  Who will it be?  Tune in this weekend to find out!

WWE Releases

As many of you may know, WWE has released dozens of wrestlers and backstage staff in the last 24 hours.  As of this writing, the list currently stands as:

- Drake Maverick (James Curtin)
- Curt Hawkins (Brian Myers)
- Karl Anderson (Chad Allegra)
- Luke Gallows (Drew Hankinson)
- Heath Slater (Heath Miller)
- Aiden English (Matthew Rehwoldt)
- Eric Young (Jeremy Fritz)
- EC3 (Michael Hutter)
- Lio Rush (Lionel Green)
- Kurt Angle 
- Sarah Logan (Sarah Rowe)
- Mike Chioda
- Primo (Edwin Colon) 
- Epico (Orlando Colon Nieves)
- Rowan (Joseph Ruud)
- Mike Kanellis (Mike Bennett)
- Maria Kanellis
- Zack Ryder (Matthew Cardona)
- No Way Jose (Levis Valenzuela)
- Rusev (Miroslav Barnyashev)
- Deonna Purrazzo 
- Aleksandar Jaksic
- Dave (Fit) Finlay
- Lance Storm
- Mike Rotunda
- Shane (Hurricane) Helms
- Scott Armstrong
- Pat Buck
- Sarah Stock
- Shawn Davari
- Billy Kidman

This is total BULLSHIT!  WWE is sitting on half a billion dollars of cash reserves.  This is an obvious move meant to placiate mark stockholders who don't realize that talent costs represent a LUDICROUSLY low 10% of expenses.  In Japan, WWE would be called a "black company" and well deserved.  I hope some good comes of this.

Speaking of which, and moving back into continuity, will any of these talented wrestlers make their way to the AWL?  The answer: Maybe.

All AWL footage through Golden War 2020 has been filmed and is in the proverbial can.  As for what happens afterwards, I have no idea but it's certainly possible and I'd be lying if I didn't say that there were names in that list that any booker would be drooling to have on their rosters and I'm no exception.  Hopefully some of them will make it to the AWL Dojo or preferably the AWL Arena.

Until then, please support independent wrestling and your favorite wrestlers directly if you can.  Stay safe, stay healthy, and remember: We're all in this together.

Two title matches announced for Golden War 2020

                With the next AWL Supercard right around the corner, the AWL Commissioner is wasting no time finding challengers to try and take the AWL championships back from Dr. Jigoku’s Augments.

Jigoku DESTROY (C) vs. ResuRED (#1)

AWL Grand Championship Match

3^rd Title Defense

                The bad doctor’s greatest weapon faces the leader of the Purosentai Resurangers.  Now, to be clear, this is ResuRED’s rightful  shot as #1 contender in the AWL Best 4.  Red is NOT cashing in his Golden Opportunity.

X-Drone (C) vs. Azteckaizer NEO

AWL Intercontinental Championship Match

1^st Title Defense

                Yeah, the Commissioner is pulling out the BIG guns for this one, isn’t he?  X-Drone is only a few days into his reign as AWL IC Champion and his first challenger is the most recent former AWL Grand Champion!  I guess with The Augments controlling all the men’s gold, there’s no room for half measures.

                As for the tag team titles, there’s plenty of time for a team to make their way to 3 points.  Over in the Joshi division, well…tune back in tomorrow.

AWL 310: Hassan vs. X-Drone

Full Card for AWL 310

                Keeping it short and simple this week.  The AWL Commissioner has announced the full card for this weekend’s AWL 310 event from the AWL Dojo.

AWL 310

MAIN EVENT

Hassan (C) vs. X-Drone

AWL Intercontinental Championship Match

4^th Title Defense

                Dr. Jigoku’s master plan to control ALL the championships in the Animated Wrestling League continues into Phase 4 as the ultimate gimmick infringer challenges The Arab American Dream to a mirror match.  Hassan, as always, is ready to accept any challenge even if the risk is Jigoku getting his rubber gloved hands on every men’s title in the company.

Jessica Kidd vs. Nekomusume

Fight for 4

                After losing to the unranked Jessica Kidd at AWL 307, Nekomusume has been removed from the AWL Best 4 and must now fight her way back in.  Jessica Kidd, on the other hand, beat a ranked wrestler.  That’s usually enough to earn a spot in the Best 4 outright, but Lady Smooth also lost the Iron Woman Match at the Supercard (a match which earned Akira Merune the #3 position by the way).  So, at AWL 310, both women will have a chance to earn their way into the title picture.

Tiger Brothers (0) vs. Danger 13 (1)

Points in Play

                As one team of tigers falls, the next generation rises to take their place.  The first obstacle in their path, a team forged out of desperation and self-preservation.

Satoshi Tobu vs. Hasaiki

                The newest member of the AWL Roster makes his long…err…several days awaited return to the AWL Dojo.  Satoshi Tobu makes his regular season debut against a man without a faction desperately searching for a path to glory.  Speaking of Satoshi Tobu, I had hoped to sit down with him for an interview, but unfortunately that has been pushed back until next week.

 

The Augments vs. Sekai-gun

Trios Match

                The Augments now control 3 championships.  Jigoku
DESTROY is both AWL Grand Champion AND the New Year’s Tournament Champion.  Even worse, as of last week, The Augments are AWL World’s Tag Team Champions.  This week, this newly minted Golden Trio will step into the ring.  Their opposition?  The teammates of the last remaining male human champion in the AWL: Hassan’s friends in the World Army…Sekai-gun!

AWL By the Numbers--Post SMWG 2020 Edition

                A supercard is a big enough deal that it makes sense to look at the state of the AWL after Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis…by the numbers.

AWL Grand Championship:

Current Champion: Jigoku DESTROY

20^th Champion.

Champion since: AWL 305

Title Defenses: 2

AWL Best 4:

1. ResuRED

2. Wyvern

3. Shynron

4. Lee Masters

AWL Joshi Championship:

Current Champion: Dragoness

3^rd Champion

Champion since: AWL 288

Title Defenses: 2

AWL Best 4:

1. Wild Thing

2. Athena Jane

3. Akira Merune

4. TBD

AWL World’s Tag Team Championship:

Current Champions: The Augments (Project Tetsu & Project Z)

33rd Champions

Champions since: Sauramania Wrestlegenesis 2020.

Title Defenses: 0

Points:

3 Points: N/A

2 Points: The New Classics, K&K.

1 Point: Golden School of the Tiger Style, Ganba’s Shadows, Danger 13.

AWL Joshi Tag Team Championship:

Current Champions: UK Gen2

4^th Champions

Champions since: AWL 303.

Title Defenses: 1

Points:

3 Points: N/A

2 Points: N/A

1 Point: Purosentai Resuranger

AWL Intercontinental Championship:

Current Champion: Hassan

20^th Champion

Champion since: AWL 299

Title Defenses: 3

Golden Opportunities:

ResuRED, ResuBLUE, ResuBLACK, Chiba Akagi.

Notice for future AWL episodes

(The following post is half in continuity and half out of continuity.)

                We have officially run through all the footage shot before the current viral crisis became a thing.  While I COULD just keep filming in the normal AWL Arena (since computer generated characters can’t actually get sick) it’s become weird and distracting seeing a whole bunch of people crammed into an audience like that.

                Therefore, in response to the current pandemic, all AWL events are being moved to the AWL Dojo until further notice.  This will be the first time ever that cameras will be allowed inside the Animated Wrestling League’s training facility.

                Furthermore, there will be no human fans allowed at AWL tapings until the current crisis has past.  Instead, the audience area will be filled with state of the art Japanese robots programmed to react to professional wrestling matches as human fans would.  We expect this will go a long way towards minimizing the spread and risk of the disease.

                Unfortunately, WWE 2k19 does not allow me to create an empty arena OR to dim the crowd lights to the point the crowd cannot be seen, so they’re robots now, OK?

AWL Supercard: Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis 2020

Grand Championship Promos

                Last promos before Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis and that means it’s time to turn over the blog to the champion and challenger in the AWL Grand Championship main event title match.

Dr. Jigoku: Oh you irritating plebian!  Again, you vex me during my work?!  *Ugh* Fine, I’ll give you the pointless promotional pontificating you seem so desperate for.

                This is a long term experiment.  The New Year’s Tournament was phase one.  The Golden Opportunity was phase two.  The super card with the infantile name is phase 3.  Once we take the tag team titles, all that remains is that jingoistic fool and…ugh…the female division.

                All is going according to plan.  What?  The suplex barbarian?  No, I don’t care.  He doesn’t stand a chance against my destroyer AND THAT TRAINED FIGHTING MONKEY WAS A FLUKE!!  GET OUT!!

“Suplex Master” Sammy Nix: Ya know, any title match is a big freakin deal!  But this time I’ve got tha whole AWL on my back!  I’ve been here fer all tha big threats.  Tha AOE, Yarina, Bullet Club, and now Docta Jigoku.  He’s lasted longer than any a tha others, but his day will come and it starts wid me.  Hakaisha was a good guy, but I’ve thrown him around tha ring before and I can do it again!

Tag Team Promos

                This weekend at AWL Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis, no less than 6 tag teams will enter the AWL Ring.  Titles and points will be on the line.  First, I went to the champions and challengers for the AWL World’s Tag Team Championships…to limited success.

Tiger Mask W:

Spring Tiger: I’m sorry, but Tiger Mask II & Tiger the Dark are in training and cannot be disturbed.  But I can promise you that at Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis you will see the best version of Tiger Mask W you’ve ever seen.  Considering that they have to wrestle a pair of in human monsters, they’re going to have to be.

                Huh?  No, Tiger Mask II was not seriously injured in his match with whatever’s left of Hakaisha.  Bumps, bruises, and a seriously wounded pride, but nothing else.  He’ll be fine by this weekend.  The heeling techniques of the Tiger Dynasty were up to the task.

                The past is behind us, what matters now is keeping the AWL World’s Tag Team Titles away from Dr. Jigoku.

The Augments:

Dr. Jigoku: Go away!  I have preparations to make.  No time for foolish questions.  No time no time no time!!

                Not the most productive of interviews I know, but I had more luck with the 4 teams that will participate in the 4-Way Elimination Match.  3 teams to eliminate.  1 point per elimination.  Any team that runs the table will walk out with 3 points and an AWL World’s Tag Team Title Match.  All 6 losers go home with nothing.  Two teams enter the match with zero points. 

Solar Wings:

Erupcion Solar: It’s hard to find your niche in the AWL.  I haven’t been very successful since Sensei retired and I’d hoped a new tag team would bring me back to my roots.  Our first two matches didn’t work out, but we still made it onto the supercard and we have a chance to walk out of the AWL Arena with 3 points and a fast track to the tag team titles.  Now, our opponents are all great wrestlers…

The Roc: AWW give The Roc a break!  Our opponents at Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis are a combination of no talent jobronis and washed up has-beens.  The Flying Yukis?  More like the flying dookies!  They may have been the AWL Tag Team Champions of the world, but they’re still called the Cinderella story, well the fairy tale ends HERE AND NOW!  Kyojin Kobayashi, nothing but an overgrown pile of monkey crap that doesn’t know a hammerlock from his hemorrhoids and Tanaka Kenichi, Jesus Flying Christ on a 2x4 does that little bastard SUCK!  7 years in the AWL and can anyone name on single thing he’s done on his own without cheating?  Anyone?  Anyone at all?  The Roc didn’t think so!  That brings us to Cross Has Kinky Sex with Generation or whatever the blue hell their name is.  Now The Roc will give credit where it’s due, you two beat The Roc and Erupcion Solar last week.  You both know what you’re doing inside our ring.  But Chiba Akagi, all your holds and locks and bars and bells and whistles mean exactly SQUAT when there are 4 other guys, a living lucha legend, and THE most electrifying professional wrestler in the world today to breakup everything you try!   And Matt Classic.  What else is there for The Roc to say about Matt Classic other than, “YOU’RE TOO OLD FOR THIS!”  You failed your kid and now you’re going to fail every student you’ve ever trained.  Chiba Akagi has a better chance at becoming AWL Joshi Champion before he holds a tag team title with your broken down old ass.  At the Supercard the only thing that will happen is the Solar Wings walking out #1 contenders, IF YA SEEEEEELLLLLLL THE ROC’S MERCH.  EN.  DICE!!

The Flying Yukis:

Hiroyuki Shota: Our whole careers we’ve been the underdogs, the Cinderella story, the little guys who didn’t belong in the tag team title picture.  We’re sick of that!  This elimination match is the first step to proving we aren’t a fluke.  We’ve gotten 3 points in one match before so we’re in familiar territory here.  Others can talk a big game and we’ll do our talking in the ring.

                Ryusensei here yet again.  The teams you just heard from come in with nothing to lose.  However, last weekend two teams picked up a point.  This is a double edged sword.  On the one hand, they only need to beat two teams to earn a title shot giving them a big of wiggle room.  On the other hand, they have something to protect.  Something to lose.  Let’s see what they think going into this match.

K&K:

“THUGLIFE” Tanaka Kenichi: BIG man, YES!  BIG winner, YES!  My no Mr. BIG MAN win win win 3 points perfecto!  We are cool!  You am f**k!

CrossXGeneration:

Matt Classic Sr.: I don’t know anything about this kind of match, but Chiba tells me that I basically have to beat everyone who isn’t on my team.  Doesn’t sound too difficult.  But I know the entire AWL is asking the same question.  How is this going to help me get my claw on that coward Ganba?  Simple.  Wins are power.  Belts are power.  If I get enough power, I can force that demonic bastard into a match.  Is it a great plan?  Probably not.  Maybe I just miss coaching young technically gifted wrestlers.  Lee and Sammy don’t need me anymore.  But I can still to some good.  I need a drink.

Joshi Division Promos

                Starting today we have a series of comments from the major players at Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis.  We begin with the AWL Joshi Division.  First, the champion and challenger in the AWL Joshi Championship Match:

Dragoness:

                I’m sorry.  It’s been nearly half a season and this is the first time I’m defending the AWL Joshi Championship.  I could blame the AWL Commissioner, the rest of the division, my tag team matches, or any number of other people.  But this is my fault.  If I win this match, you have my word that it won’t be another 2 months before I defend it again.

                ResuPINK, this isn’t going to be a personal blood feud or a grudge match.  I resect you and all the Purosentai Resurangers.  But I’m going to beat you because I can’t let my title reign end like this.

ResuPINK:

                We have nothing but respect for you and your family as well.   We know that The Augments are coming for all the AWL Titles and it’s our duty to protect the AWL from the forces of evil.  My team mates still have three Golden Opportunities, but I have to take that title to protect it and the entire Animated Wrestling League.

Ryusensei here again.  The AWL Joshi Championship Match is not the only match to showcase the division on this Supercard.  One of the biggest feuds in all of the Animated Wrestling League has been the rivalry between The Mistress of 1000 Holds vs. “Lady Smooth” Jessica Kidd.  While titles have changed hands between them and there have been wins and losses in tag team and handicap matches, there has NEVER been a clear decision between them one on one.  That WILL change this weekend at SMWG because they will have 30 minutes to settle things in the first ever AWL Iron Woman Match!  We got comments from both wrestlers as they were training for this colossal fight.

Jessica Kidd:

                I don’t think anyone can understand how embarrassing it was to go 5 rounds with Akira Merune and not even find a single fall.  My dad was one of the last guys practicing the traditional style of British wrestling.  He trained me from basically as soon as I could walk so I could carry on the tradition in a world where the best British wrestlers in the world are wrestling American style matches.  They’re killing it, but they’re playing someone else’s game.

                This weekend, I have the chance to get some of my own back.  An Iron Woman Match is not that different from a World of Sport Match.  It’s basically 6 rounds without rest periods.  Akira-senshu has only ever wrestled one fall matches and none of her title defenses have ever gone anywhere near the 30 minute mark.  I’m better trained for this and that’s why I will win!

Akira Merune:

                I admit.  I don’t like losing.  Losing the AWL Joshi Championship was the worst day of my life and losing the tag team titles not once but twice, and the second time in our first title defense made me angry at myself.  But there’s one thing we have in common, we both left that World of Sport Match unsatisfied.  This weekend, let’s finish this!

Final Card for AWL Supercard: Sakuramania Wrestlegenesis 2020!

MAIN EVENT

Jigoku DESTROY (C) vs. “Suplex Master” Sammy Nix

AWL Grand Championship Match

2^nd Title Defense

Jessica Kidd vs. Akira Merune

30 Minute Iron Woman Match

Tiger Mask W (C) vs. The Augments (3)

AWL World’s Tag Team Championship Match

1^st Title Defense

Dragoness (C) vs. ResuPINK (#1)

AWL Joshi Championship Match

2^nd Title Defense

Solar Wings (0) vs. Kenichi & Kobayashi (1) vs. The Flying Yukis (0) vs. CrossXGeneration (1)

4-Way Elimination Match

Points in Play

Takamichi Shin vs. Satoshi Tobu

AWL Dojo Graduation Match